The Third World, and its Inhabitants

My G-d, I haven't updated this for aeons! Well, it all boils down to my new assignment, where I don't get much time to muck around with this. Besides I don't get to do lots of visa stuff these days. Well, that hasn't stopped fate bringing idiot visa officers on my way. Looking back at all these years, it had dawned upon me that there is little one can do to reduce collective stupidity of humans – but someone can select the imbeciles out of the stupid and assign them to third world countries like Sri Lanka! Ladies and gentlemen, welcome your new visa officer....

Here is a case study example of how these people tick.

An eighty two year old retired woman applied for UK visa – and was promptly refused. In a nutshell, the ECO fears she'd remain there without returning. Taking a stab at the ECO's reasoning, one can get a glimpse of the collective paranoia these people are immersed in.

You don't have any income. How many 80+ little old ladies you know comply with this condition? None? Oh I know two, (sadly late) Mrs Jean Hunter of Gants Hill, and another in Romford road. Constant regular income in both cases I assume, was OAP.

Your son has sought ILR. Well, that complaint shall be directed towards parliament – where they make these rules. Is my visa application assessed according to actions of my kith and kin? What if late Mr Dick Turpin had been, say a distant grand uncle of someone. I refuse your application as I notice that one of your uncles has been late Mr Richard Turpin. Considering the character of this individual...... It will be a highway robbery alright – of the visa fees paid in good faith.

You don't have extensive family in Sri Lanka. Ah that old chestnut. This is actually one of the weasel words (phrases?) constantly employed by ECO's to find some grounds for refusal. How many of the two parents, siblings, and other close relatives does one expect to have come all this way with her to the ripe old age of 82? Surely it would have been a matter of global concern if she had the entire entourage at this age.

Well, the ECO rants on. However let me bring about a brief case for the “accused” here. An eighty plus lady, who wishes to meet her only son in UK is unlikely to seek either asylum or go underground in UK. Simply because she does not get any NHS, she is unemployable, she has no grand plans for next 50 years to come, and she can't stand the cold weather or isolation at this age. Put it this way. She doesn’t even buy green bananas!

Now you tell me if these people are not a bunch of imbecilic lunatics or hypocrites. Its written on the wall, as far as I am concerned. Living here in a third world nation, even the apparel trade is more orderly and responsible than Her Majesty's visa officers. I recently had the opportunity to take an in-depth look at how the apparel industry performs. Lo and behold, there is responsibility. The one thing the Chennai deputy high commission lacks. And people pay them money for assessing their application. That man, Mr Turpin, must be turning in his grave like an omelet! Only if he had the legitimate framework to rob people of their money in broad daylight. Well, it was a different century after all. Amen.