CREDO: The festival of light that signifies an inextinguishable faith

CREDO: The festival of light that signifies an inextinguishable faith

Restaurant at the End of the Universe

Here on this gloomy day in Colombo, I’d rather wish I wrote something about getting US spousal visa – alas, the End Of The World Is Nigh people got the better of me, so here you are reading their handiwork. Now, this most certainly is a visa matter. Look at it this way. Accordingly to Australian government, the Sri Lanka boat people are coming there in hordes because they find it impossible to live here. Now that this accursed planet is going to blow up or something, we ALL need a visa from here to elsewhere. Yet despite of my knowledge on visas and immigration, I can’t think of a place to go from here. Martians are unlikely to welcome the bigoted small minded Earthlings, the Jovians find us distasteful, can’t go to Mercury as it is damn hot out there (besides Vulcan is not such a nice guy to stick around with anyways), and Venusians are too sexy for us!

As much as the situation of going elsewhere is hopeless, there is one consolation for me so far as no one had rung me up to ask if it's possible to get a consultation on going from here to another planet. If they did, they would not be disappointed as I had just negotiated with the beings at Arcturus Sector 5, who are quite happy to welcome the entire population of Earth, provided we find our own means of transportation. There is one little question that nags my conscience though, someone told me that they are having an acute shortage of edible meats up there… Oh, nevermind, it's deadmeat anyways and what’s so morally wrong in making a buck or two while the sun shines above?    

Making an excursion into ground reality, the matter does not become funny at all. One person narrated a view held by some Christian sect – Satan is very angry with the shape of things (not referring to the female kind, they are in good shape alright, Satan can go to hell if he is unhappy with that shape) and that Satan, in his anger, will hit the world with his hand so the world will break up into pieces. Fortunately for the believers of the sect, those pieces with believers will be left unharmed while those with unbelievers will perish. Good for them, except if at the time of Satan’s blow, let us say that a bus had both believers and unbelievers on it… Or, if it happens that an unbeliever is f*%#ing a believer at the time – I mean unlike in the bus scenario, these two would be a bit difficult to be separated…

Or here is a juicier bit from the local astrologers – the bastards who appear on sycophantic government sucking up local television stations -   “the world maybe destroyed, but Sri Lanka will remain intact..”. Either this stupid country exists not on this planet or people who believe these a-holes have no brains. Assuming that somehow this is possible, the Sri Lankans will have a worse fate than death in stock for them. The country does not even produce a bearing ball, let alone any form of medicine or oil or enough food for them to eat. So the unscathed sole survivors of imminent world destruction will be constantly assailed by severe tooth pains, every form of disease known to man including gonorrhea, will have no transport, no plastic, oh and no food. Have you ever had a severe tooth pain while you are dead hungry with a scratchy feeling on your privates? Let us leave that to the imagination from here onwards, yet I find it a bit difficult to recruit volunteers, even the most intrepid types to inhabit this land after the apocalypse.

What I am going to tell you is that people here are indeed scared out of their wits. There had been three confirmed meteorite falling here in last week (highest figure for recent times – mostly because people are ogling the skies), floods in uncalled for places (including yesterday), fish rains in three confirmed locations including near Ruhunu University, and to top it all, red-rain (most likely some fungal agent) in two locations, and here in Colombo it's cold and gloomy with little visibility of sun throughout the day. No, Mother nature is not helping either. You could hardly walk into a public place without having to overhear a conversation referring to end of the world, and the idiots at mass media are fuelling the fears through their own theories of the outcome. It is surely understandable why we are so worried what’s in stock for us on 21^st December.

Worried or otherwise, I too have a serious concern over this matter, and it's not the fellers at Arcturus Sector with their food problem. No kids, all that matters not. Not a single one of the pretty female variety I accosted on streets and asked “How about some fun before the end of the world babe..?” had responded positively – and that for me is a matter of grave seriousness than the planetary doom.

I hope they’d all regret their decision when the ground below them starts to give the shakes, for I alone have a visa and meal tickets for two at The Restaurant at the End of the Universe….No wonder they call girls silly, huh.

The life @ 42nd Street

Once upon a time, long before the advent of horrifying prospects of impending doom of this small minded, uncivilized planet, in a town named after an engineer, there was a night club called the 42^nd Street. Oh, there was another club there too, but that would not be advisable to go there because the Ice House was full of pre-teen schoolgirls. Well, except in the case of those seeking some bent forms of companionship that is.

I am telling you this because UK visa officers attached to Colombo have a form of perversion that prevents them from considering “other” possibilities. Someone might go to Ice House simply to get away from drunken hefty builder type in white vans, for an example. Alas, a perverted mind sees no alternative possibility bar the one that his perversion forces upon him. Having to deal with UK ECO’s as a part of my life, I get to appreciate the hurdles encountered by people who have a confused perception of reality. Schizophrenia in short.

It is important that you know how wound up these people are if you are seeking to apply for UK or Canada visa from Colombo – or from many other third world countries for that matter. A recent juicy bit from a UK ECO refusal letter reads as follows “and I note that you have not submitted any evidence of your personal and financial circumstances. The documents provided with your application are all in the name of Mr. XYZ, yet you have provided no evidence as to your relationship or why he would offer to fund this trip for you”. Sounds fine, except for the fact that the schizop@ UKHC.colombo had ignored there is £ 7,000+ of cash in her (applicant’s) bank account since about two years ago, and the guy involved in the case is her f$%@ing husband.

Actually there is a piece of evidence that the ECO at UKHC Colombo subtly demands from ladies. But it is a bit technically difficult to provide within the limits of decency, then again in these enlightened days, nothing is beyond being considered possible. How much of wife problems these people have I do not know, neither do I intend to venture to seek out – who knows, it could be a female pervert hiding behind those acronyms!

Switching back to the original discussion, in that town which was named after the engineer, the one which had two night clubs, there is this little weakness amongst the town people, or so the saying goes – at least among the people outside of that town. It says that everyone in the town with two night clubs look a bit the same. Now I am not making this up or anything, but come to think of it, they indeed do look a bit alike. One is left to wonder why. Here having a dozy first day @ 42^nd Street, enjoying the idle flow of life and wondering what it could be like at the other place (the one with little schoolgirls that is), I look at their faces and they are increasingly becoming similar to one another, facewise that is. Will an ECO consider this be a good enough reason to go about a place – to see a place where everyone looks alike? One day I’d like to write that on a visa application, under the reasons for your travel category, and wait to see the reaction. Wound up like rubber-bands, who knows if that would fit in with their altered reality.

Do you know why? Because no amount of evidence that the man funding the trip is a woman’s fu@%ing husband will cut no ice with them, and considering where these perverts are actually coming from (country of origin that is) I wonder what fate would await them little girls at the Ice House.

A boat trip to Australia - with adventures en route

Hi kidz, sorry I could not write for a while – I was busy winning a couple of cases at UK Immigration Upper Tribunal. Anyways the Home Office man did not want to contest at the last minute and everything ended nice and rosy. Now that would be service for you.

Lets hit a new topic today as this UK visa thing is getting a bit trite - how about a lovely boat trip to Australia? Australian High Commission here in Colombo is busy publishing billboard sized newspaper adverts explaining the perils of taking a boat trip to Australia. This means Boat People, OK. This is a fast growing “industry” here – hiring a deep sea trawler and stacking about 50 people with food & water supplies and then navigate it to Australian seas. Obviously the plan is to have them handed over to Oz authorities who would then house them in some god forsaken place till their asylum applications are considered, and so on. The trade has now gone critical mass and “entrepreneurs” are finding cost cutting methods – let us say such as hijacking fishing trawlers in high seas… A recent incident left at least two fishermen dead as the traffickers teamed with ship’s skipper boarded the vessel and dumped the crew overboard. Of course there is a deeper story out there, but this would suffice you to understand what turns the trade has taken.

Sometime ago I had a stint in Australia and a friend I made then asked me to give them some details on how these things are operated from heavily guarded Sri Lanka fishing ports. So I got an in-between to help me out with it. Now, before you go too far, please don't ask me for details of this guy so you could also board a shark trawler to Australia. I got him through a person who himself departed on a recent boat. So both the primary contact AND the in-between are no longer reachable unless you want to wait for them at the other end - an island preferably inhabited with cannibals... Sorry. On a particular night this contact called me and told me that a vessel will be launched in a few hours and if I would like to be there to see how it is done. Unfortunately the weather was not favourable for me to drive that long into hostile shores in such a short notice, so instead I asked him to use his advanced mobile phone to give me live updates of turn of things.

The operation was watertight in its brutal simplicity – where a more complex one would have screwed it up for everyone. Unlike what you seen in the movies, the whole boat and the gangplank etc. were well lit; the “passengers” were kept in a safe house and were only informed the very, very last minute of their impending departure. All mobile phones, any type of electronic device, anything that could be used as a weapon, were all removed from boarding passengers as they came down from hired HiAce vans to board the vessel. The van operators may not have been informed either (a guess, as I did not see anyone clearly). I could clearly see two little children among them. Although the video was not clear, they all looked a destitute bunch from the looks of it. The operation was over in less than an hour and off they went, taking advantage of timing and cover of rain to avoid detection.

I was told that the skipper and his assistant were the only crew that knew of the operation and the others (though I do not know how many there were) were only informed the last minute. Perhaps this is what leads to violence in high seas as some crew do not volunteer to take part in such perilous operations and protest… My contact interviewed two passengers for me and to my utter surprise one of them turned out to be a government servant! A government post being a dream coming true in this country and I still wonder if it is all worth it for him.

As much as I understand the illegality of this operation and the risk these people are taking, including life and limb and the very real possibility of being held for ransom, 30 seconds interview my contact had with them convinced me the strength of their case: Absolute disillusionment with “The Wonder of Asia” and having no other recourse in the face of oppression and lawlessness of their daily life.

What I am saying is not that this is the Sri Lanka reality for everyone here or that every boat man from Sri Lanka has a strong case for seeking asylum. Nor am I saying that Australian authorities should take a more sympathetic view on asylum seekers from Sri Lanka because they are oppressed or disillusioned or something – for an example, a recent world happiness indexing survey had put Sri Lanka on high ranking and all. Nope, I am not even worried about the moralities associated with the so called “Human Trafficking Business”, oh, and I care not a penny about the white shark lurking the Australian waters even.

My case rests on a rather simpler tenet: Publishing expensive paper advertisements is not going to dissuade anyone from taking a rather adventurous boat trip to Australia. That money and effort is better spent on remedying the underlining causes that push people to the ends of their tether – such as accountability and rule of law – or rather lack of them.   

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Overnight Express of visa rule changes

Every now and then we are having clients whom we simply can’t help. This is certainly the case when these people are ones who are pitted against immigration law changes. Let me give you two recent examples.

The Canadians, in their wisdom, have recently axed off several categories from their skilled migration list. So people like process managers, accountants, and their ilk who are running support services will no longer be eligible for applying under that category anymore. Considering the true objectives of the migration programmes, it is surely understandable that certain job categories will lose their ability to contribute to economic and social growth as time passes by. No one can argue against the logic behind that decision. But what annoys me is the modus operandi of its execution. This law change affects people who have applied for migration more than five years ago. Meaning all their hopes and dreams have been washed away by a simple pencil stroke in an unseen office, holed up somewhere in Canada. There was no pilot period, no warning, no nothing. As much as I understand that Canada may no longer require accountants (whom I despise anyways!!), it is not fair to chop off their appendages after being taken for a ride for over five years. If the Canadian outfit handling the migration applications is overburdened with a millennium long backlog, it is surely not the fault of the applicants, but of Canadian government who have been unable to address issues in their own backyard. Knowing that there is a hefty visa fee included in part and parcel of the migration application process, it leaves you wondering where all that money went.

The second example comes from UKBA. Accordingly to The Guarniad (no spelling mistake), UKBA had just revoked the Highly Trusted Sponsor status of London Metropolitan University. This means that current international students of LMU have become illegal aliens in London - it happened last night, again without a warning, like one of those apocalyptic catastrophes which rid the planet of dinosaurs - except some T-Rex may have survived and found jobs at UKBA.. I am ranting because international students went by the high esteem afforded to LMU by no other authority than UKBA itself, and now the T-Rex turned around and bit off its head.

Time and time again I have warned prospective students (the genuine kind, that is) of duplicity of UKBA and their credential accreditation programme. This is not something unheard of as far as UKBA reputation is concerned. They would give positive accreditation to any plonker with a home brewed college, and then revoke it overnight claiming that the institution is a visa scam. The local British Council will also snare prospective students with colourful brochures and pies in the sky - only till you pay a hefty tuition fee and a visa fee for CAS, both which you could ultimately lose as the bastards at UKBA have suddenly become aware that the institution is not genuine.

If anyone of you reading this is planning to migrate or going for studies, my advice is to beware of the danger you are putting yourself in with these two countries. Canadian immigration services will take till your retirement age to process your application - and then refuse it on the grounds that you are over age to qualify, and, UKBA will wank on your face by revoking the license they granted to your education service provider (on which assurance alone you applied in the first place) and they will screw you and your future while robbing you of your savings.

There you are, QED, how colourful a proof is that for the Theorem of Despaire !

UK / Europe Job Offers (with an unkind twist)

Hi Kidz, I'm back!! Isn't that wonderful. Perhaps that depends mostly on your point of view, ah nevermind we are here, aren’t we. Things here are not all that rosy as my beautiful secretary is leaving us. So this would be her swansong on the blog. The blog might never be the same without her, what a pity. Here is wishing her every good fortune & lots of happiness and prosperity wherever she takes herself.

OK here is little something I need to tell you all who are looking for Nanny / Child-care jobs in UK and some other European destinations. In short, beware what you are doing and who you are dealing with coz it could be a scam! At length its a Tale of Two Cities. The cities of London, UK, and Manila in Philippine.

Recently an acquaintance of ours came here, and boy was she bouncing with joy. She had landed this very lucrative nanny job in UK. She had long email communications with her UK boss, and they (host family) sounded very nice. They were kind enough to concede some grounds for her convenience and they even sent pics of these two gorgeous kids she will be looking after, and pictures of family home, her room, etc. The host/employer family husband was handling all the emails and she was invited to call him on his personal mobile number if she wanted to know anything. They sent her a copy of the contract which was nicely set with very agreeable conditions.

Once she had agreed to the job, they asked her to contact an Agency which handles the matter for them. This agency will do visa invitations, Home Office approvals, and everything. Despite of her vivacity to be there with them lovely kids and all, it's my business to be thorough with all the paperwork here. So I went through the emails (which were OK really) and then there was this last email which asked her to contact this Agency in UK. Now there was something very fishy there. The email ran “.. inform them its Moor family nanny..”. One look at that line and warning bells went off in my mind. Who the f&%k do they think they are, these Moors, with their common surname to have a reference with that? Now this was very odd, no agency I know in UK gives your name as reference in these matters. So I asked her if they sent her a file number or something as the reference at Agency and she returned in negative. This is odd, I told her, but made a mental note to peruse emails more carefully. Lo and behold, they were riddled with spellings and grammar mistakes and number of discrepancies would have a defence lawyer in a murder case laughing all the way to the bank.

Well, its a long story. But to cut it short they had offered her a wage packet of over £35,000 per year and only six days of work plus the use of telephone and an LED TV in her room! A brain surgeon in UK will be getting much less than that salary and I knew that no one can afford (nor will pay) this money for a simple child-care girl. Oh, they might, if their kids she had to tackle were Damien the Devil Child in “The Omen” - and the Moor children did not look least like beloved children of Satan. So there was no way this could be happening. So I tried to look deeper into this “Agency” which handles the hiring for the “Moor family”. They have their own website which has extensive details of their services, team members, fees, testimonials, ah oh, and a picture of their office in London... Well, they had everything. Except for two minor pieces of information: Namely a COMPLETE UK ADDRESS WITH STREET NUMBER & FULL POST CODE, and A LAND LINE PHONE NUMBER. Later it seemed that they actually do not have a UK BANK ACCOUNT. Their bankers were based in Manila, Philippine. Yeah, that place where you could buy an under-aged virgin for $150, and that was where these guys had their bank account, despite of being a UK company. 

So I told her that this was not a real job offer. This is an internet scam to get your money. there is no real visa or a job here to go to UK. Fortunately she got it quickly and did not send them any money. Lucky girl!

My advice :

If you are looking for ANY job in UK/Europe first check what people are actually paid for that occupation. If your offered salary is more than what citizens of that country are getting then its not a real job.

If any host/sponsor indicated your job has a part like WORKING WITH CHILDREN, DRIVING, DEALING WITH BANKS, then be very careful as in UK these things are regulated by government. You need clearance for working with kids, need a license to drive a car, etc. These people might not be telling you the truth.

If you are asked to contact, or make a payment to, or to deal with, an agency – make sure that this agency has a Land Phone Number which you could call. A mobile phone number is certainly a fake. Do not trust them.

The sponsor / host AND the agency must have a UK full address, a UK bank account, a UK registration number, and an official UK based email address. Gmail, Yahoo, Hotmail email addresses are not to be trusted.

The embassy or High Commission of that country where you live maybe able to help you if you are in doubt. Do not hesitate to call them if you feel unsafe in any part of the deal. If your intentions are honest, there is no need to run away from the embassy! Call them.

If the sponsor or agency ask you to make any payment, then be very careful. This is most likely an internet scam. Do not be deceived by pictures of children / or offices. Type their address on Google and see if you can see them on Google-Earth satellite photo! Write a letter to their address with your contact details and see if you get a reply.If they do not say they got your letter - Stop it, these people are fakes.

We hope this would help you to find your way through millions of internet scammers who are out there to get some of your hard earned money. If you had been a victim of these people, please do come out and share your experience so someone else may be saved. 

Thanks & have a nice day

and Thank You Much Much Much.... my outgoing secretary. You turned many gloomy days here into halcyon days, and you shall be bitterly missed. 

So long, and thanks for all the fish

God bless America

On her autobiography “The Price of My soul”, Bernadette Devlin (yeah go Google her up, it's worth it) wrote that the title of the book does not imply anything about the monetary value of her soul, but merely the human experience of possessing one (my interpretation). Now I wouldn't want you to think I had sold myself off to the Yanks by merely judging this post from its title either. But when you see Uncle Sam chipping in positively on our behalf (4377, I could be much misguided here), it's only fair to give credit where it's due.

American foreign policy had always been a prickly issue as far as I am concerned, and I guess I am not in a club of one. Lo and behold, they suddenly had a change of heart and had been giving off some VERY positive vibes recently. Maybe Obummer is not as bad as some people make him out to be, who knows. Like hell I had been a fan of this guy since his first days (though I still put McCain on top, a man for whom I have great respect). Confusing? Get used to it kiddos, that's uniquely Sri Lankan.

So when it came to writing something about Uncle Sam, there was this internal conflict – which one to pick? Now Dubya is certainly out of question – who the f%$£ in his right mind would want to put him in a congratulatory blog, and the Presidential Clockmaker is a bit of a touchy subject, lest there be kids reading this and doing a bit of Googling.... Nah, these modern ones will not do. Rewind 150 odd years and you meet no lesser persona than Abe Lincoln. But if I ever had the impunity & insolence to write of Abe Lincoln myself, it would be desecration – and I know that. So rather I leave the great man to talk for himself, and do consider yourselves to be blessed for getting an offside opportunity to read his inauguration speech.

Ladies & gentlemen, His Excellency The President of the United States of America, Abraham Lincoln (on 4^th March 1861 at Washington, D.C.) :

Fellow-citizens of the United States:
In compliance with a custom as old as the government itself, I appear before you to address you briefly, and to take, in your presence, the oath prescribed by the Constitution of the United States, to be taken by the President "before he enters on the execution of this office."

I do not consider it necessary at present for me to discuss those matters of administration about which there is no special anxiety or excitement.

Apprehension seems to exist among the people of the Southern States, that by the accession of a Republican Administration, their property, and their peace, and personal security, are to be endangered. There has never been any reasonable cause for such apprehension. Indeed, the most ample evidence to the contrary has all the while existed, and been open to their inspection. It is found in nearly all the published speeches of him who now addresses you. I do but quote from one of those speeches when I declare that "I have no purpose, directly or indirectly, to interfere with the institution of slavery in the States where it exists. I believe I have no lawful right to do so, and I have no inclination to do so." Those who nominated and elected me did so with full knowledge that I had made this, and many similar declarations, and had never recanted them. And more than this, they placed in the platform, for my acceptance, and as a law to themselves, and to me, the clear and emphatic resolution which I now read:

Resolved, That the maintenance inviolate of the rights of the States, and especially the right of each State to order and control its own domestic institutions according to its own judgment exclusively, is essential to that balance of power on which the perfection and endurance of our political fabric depend; and we denounce the lawless invasion by armed force of the soil of any State or Territory, no matter what pretext, as among the gravest of crimes."

I now reiterate these sentiments; and in doing so, I only press upon the public attention the most conclusive evidence of which the case is susceptible, that the property, peace and security of no section are to be in any wise endangered by the now incoming Administration. I add too, that all the protection which, consistently with the Constitution and the laws, can be given, will be cheerfully given to all the States when lawfully demanded, for whatever cause -- as cheerfully to one section as to another.

There is much controversy about the delivering up of fugitives from service or labor. The clause I now read is as plainly written in the Constitution as any other of its provisions:

"No person held to service or labor in one State, under the laws thereof, escaping into another, shall, in consequence of any law or regulation therein, be discharged from such service or labor, but shall be delivered up on claim of the party to whom such service or labor may be due."

It is scarcely questioned that this provision was intended by those who made it, for the reclaiming of what we call fugitive slaves; and the intention of the law-giver is the law. All members of Congress swear their support to the whole Constitution -- to this provision as much as to any other. To the proposition, then, that slaves whose cases come within the terms of this clause, "shall be delivered," their oaths are unanimous. Now, if they would make the effort in good temper, could they not, with nearly equal unanimity, frame and pass a law, by means of which to keep good that unanimous oath?

There is some difference of opinion whether this clause should be enforced by national or by state authority; but surely that difference is not a very material one. If the slave is to be surrendered, it can be of but little consequence to him, or to others, by which authority it is done. And should any one, in any case, be content that his oath shall go unkept, on a merely unsubstantial controversy as to how it shall be kept?

Again, in any law upon this subject, ought not all the safeguards of liberty known in civilized and humane jurisprudence to be introduced, so that a free man be not, in any case, surrendered as a slave? And might it not be well, at the same time to provide by law for the enforcement of that clause in the Constitution which guarantees that "the citizens of each State shall be entitled to all privileges and immunities of citizens in the several States"?

I take the official oath to-day, with no mental reservations, and with no purpose to construe the Constitution or laws, by any hypercritical rules. And while I do not choose now to specify particular acts of Congress as proper to be enforced, I do suggest that it will be much safer for all, both in official and private stations, to conform to, and abide by, all those acts which stand unrepealed, than to violate any of them, trusting to find impunity in having them held to be unconstitutional.

It is seventy-two years since the first inauguration of a President under our national Constitution. During that period fifteen different and greatly distinguished citizens, have, in succession, administered the executive branch of the government. They have conducted it through many perils; and, generally, with great success. Yet, with all this scope for [of] precedent, I now enter upon the same task for the brief constitutional term of four years, under great and peculiar difficulty. A disruption of the Federal Union, heretofore only menaced, is now formidably attempted.

I hold, that in contemplation of universal law, and of the Constitution, the Union of these States is perpetual. Perpetuity is implied, if not expressed, in the fundamental law of all national governments. It is safe to assert that no government proper, ever had a provision in its organic law for its own termination. Continue to execute all the express provisions of our national Constitution, and the Union will endure forever -- it being impossible to destroy it, except by some action not provided for in the instrument itself.

Again, if the United States be not a government proper, but an association of States in the nature of contract merely, can it, as a contract, be peaceably unmade, by less than all the parties who made it? One party to a contract may violate it -- break it, so to speak; but does it not require all to lawfully rescind it?

Descending from these general principles, we find the proposition that, in legal contemplation, the Union is perpetual, confirmed by the history of the Union itself. The Union is much older than the Constitution. It was formed in fact, by the Articles of Association in 1774. It was matured and continued by the Declaration of Independence in 1776. It was further matured and the faith of all the then thirteen States expressly plighted and engaged that it should be perpetual, by the Articles of Confederation in 1778. And finally, in 1787, one of the declared objects for ordaining and establishing the Constitution, was "to form a more perfect Union." But if [the] destruction of the Union, by one, or by a part only, of the States, be lawfully possible, the Union is less perfect than before the Constitution, having lost the vital element of perpetuity.

It follows from these views that no State, upon its own mere motion, can lawfully get out of the Union, -- that resolves and ordinances to that effect are legally void, and that acts of violence, within any State or States, against the authority of the United States, are insurrectionary or revolutionary, according to circumstances.

I therefore consider that in view of the Constitution and the laws, the Union is unbroken; and to the extent of my ability I shall take care, as the Constitution itself expressly enjoins upon me, that the laws of the Union be faithfully executed in all the States. Doing this I deem to be only a simple duty on my part; and I shall perform it, so far as practicable, unless my rightful masters, the American people, shall withhold the requisite means, or in some authoritative manner, direct the contrary. I trust this will not be regarded as a menace, but only as the declared purpose of the Union that will constitutionally defend and maintain itself.

In doing this there needs to be no bloodshed or violence; and there shall be none, unless it be forced upon the national authority. The power confided to me will be used to hold, occupy, and possess the property and places belonging to the government, and to collect the duties and imposts; but beyond what may be necessary for these objects, there will be no invasion -- no using of force against or among the people anywhere. Where hostility to the United States in any interior locality, shall be so great and so universal, as to prevent competent resident citizens from holding the Federal offices, there will be no attempt to force obnoxious strangers among the people for that object. While the strict legal right may exist in the government to enforce the exercise of these offices, the attempt to do so would be so irritating, and so nearly impracticable with all, that I deem it better to forego, for the time, the uses of such offices.

The mails, unless repelled, will continue to be furnished in all parts of the Union. So far as possible, the people everywhere shall have that sense of perfect security which is most favorable to calm thought and reflection. The course here indicated will be followed, unless current events and experience shall show a modification or change to be proper; and in every case and exigency my best discretion will be exercised according to circumstances actually existing, and with a view and a hope of a peaceful solution of the national troubles, and the restoration of fraternal sympathies and affections.

That there are persons in one section or another who seek to destroy the Union at all events, and are glad of any pretext to do it, I will neither affirm nor deny; but if there be such, I need address no word to them. To those, however, who really love the Union may I not speak?

Before entering upon so grave a matter as the destruction of our national fabric, with all its benefits, its memories, and its hopes, would it not be wise to ascertain precisely why we do it? Will you hazard so desperate a step, while there is any possibility that any portion of the ills you fly from have no real existence? Will you, while the certain ills you fly to, are greater than all the real ones you fly from? Will you risk the commission of so fearful a mistake?

All profess to be content in the Union, if all constitutional rights can be maintained. Is it true, then, that any right, plainly written in the Constitution, has been denied? I think not. Happily the human mind is so constituted, that no party can reach to the audacity of doing this. Think, if you can, of a single instance in which a plainly written provision of the Constitution has ever been denied. If by the mere force of numbers, a majority should deprive a minority of any clearly written constitutional right, it might, in a moral point of view, justify revolution -- certainly would, if such right were a vital one. But such is not our case. All the vital rights of minorities, and of individuals, are so plainly assured to them, by affirmations and negations, guaranties and prohibitions, in the Constitution, that controversies never arise concerning them. But no organic law can ever be framed with a provision specifically applicable to every question which may occur in practical administration. No foresight can anticipate, nor any document of reasonable length contain express provisions for all possible questions. Shall fugitives from labor be surrendered by national or by State authority? The Constitution does not expressly say. May Congress prohibit slavery in the territories? The Constitution does not expressly say. Must Congress protect slavery in the territories? The Constitution does not expressly say.

From questions of this class spring all our constitutional controversies, and we divide upon them into majorities and minorities. If the minority will not acquiesce, the majority must, or the government must cease. There is no other alternative; for continuing the government, is acquiescence on one side or the other. If a minority, in such case, will secede rather than acquiesce, they make a precedent which, in turn, will divide and ruin them; for a minority of their own will secede from them whenever a majority refuses to be controlled by such minority. For instance, why may not any portion of a new confederacy, a year or two hence, arbitrarily secede again, precisely as portions of the present Union now claim to secede from it? All who cherish disunion sentiments, are now being educated to the exact temper of doing this.

Is there such perfect identity of interests among the States to compose a new Union, as to produce harmony only, and prevent renewed secession?

Plainly, the central idea of secession, is the essence of anarchy. A majority, held in restraint by constitutional checks and limitations, and always changing easily with deliberate changes of popular opinions and sentiments, is the only true sovereign of a free people. Whoever rejects it, does, of necessity, fly to anarchy or to despotism. Unanimity is impossible; the rule of a minority, as a permanent arrangement, is wholly inadmissible; so that, rejecting the majority principle, anarchy or despotism in some form is all that is left.

I do not forget the position assumed by some, that constitutional questions are to be decided by the Supreme Court; nor do I deny that such decisions must be binding in any case, upon the parties to a suit; as to the object of that suit, while they are also entitled to very high respect and consideration in all parallel cases by all other departments of the government. And while it is obviously possible that such decision may be erroneous in any given case, still the evil effect following it, being limited to that particular case, with the chance that it may be over-ruled, and never become a precedent for other cases, can better be borne than could the evils of a different practice. At the same time, the candid citizen must confess that if the policy of the government upon vital questions, affecting the whole people, is to be irrevocably fixed by decisions of the Supreme Court, the instant they are made, in ordinary litigation between parties, in personal actions, the people will have ceased to be their own rulers, having to that extent practically resigned their government into the hands of that eminent tribunal. Nor is there in this view any assault upon the court or the judges. It is a duty from which they may not shrink, to decide cases properly brought before them; and it is no fault of theirs if others seek to turn their decisions to political purposes.

One section of our country believes slavery is right, and ought to be extended, while the other believes it is wrong, and ought not to be extended. This is the only substantial dispute. The fugitive slave clause of the Constitution, and the law for the suppression of the foreign slave trade, are each as well enforced, perhaps, as any law can ever be in a community where the moral sense of the people imperfectly supports the law itself. The great body of the people abide by the dry legal obligation in both cases, and a few break over in each. This, I think, cannot be perfectly cured, and it would be worse in both cases after the separation of the sections, than before. The foreign slave trade, now imperfectly suppressed, would be ultimately revived without restriction, in one section; while fugitive slaves, now only partially surrendered, would not be surrendered at all, by the other.

Physically speaking, we cannot separate. We can not remove our respective sections from each other, nor build an impassable wall between them. A husband and wife may be divorced, and go out of the presence, and beyond the reach of each other; but the different parts of our country cannot do this. They cannot but remain face to face; and intercourse, either amicable or hostile, must continue between them. Is it possible, then, to make that intercourse more advantageous or more satisfactory, after separation than before? Can aliens make treaties easier than friends can make laws? Can treaties be more faithfully enforced between aliens than laws can among friends? Suppose you go to war, you cannot fight always; and when, after much loss on both sides, and no gain on either, you cease fighting, the identical old questions, as to terms of intercourse, are again upon you.

This country, with its institutions, belongs to the people who inhabit it. Whenever they shall grow weary of the existing Government, they can exercise their constitutional right of amending it, or their revolutionary right to dismember or overthrow it. I cannot be ignorant of the fact that many worthy and patriotic citizens are desirous of having the national Constitution amended. While I make no recommendation of amendments, I fully recognize the rightful authority of the people over the whole subject to be exercised in either of the modes prescribed in the instrument itself; and I should, under existing circumstances, favor rather than oppose a fair opportunity being afforded the people to act upon it.

I will venture to add that to me the Convention mode seems preferable, in that it allows amendments to originate with the people themselves, instead of only permitting them to take or reject propositions, originated by others, not especially chosen for the purpose, and which might not be precisely such as they would wish to either accept or refuse. I understand a proposed amendment to the Constitution, which amendment, however, I have not seen, has passed Congress, to the effect that the federal government shall never interfere with the domestic institutions of the States, including that of persons held to service. To avoid misconstruction of what I have said, I depart from my purpose not to speak of particular amendments, so far as to say that holding such a provision to now be implied constitutional law, I have no objection to its being made express and irrevocable.

The Chief Magistrate derives all his authority from the people, and they have referred none upon him to fix terms for the separation of the States. The people themselves can do this if also they choose; but the executive, as such, has nothing to do with it. His duty is to administer the present government, as it came to his hands, and to transmit it, unimpaired by him, to his successor.

Why should there not be a patient confidence in the ultimate justice of the people? Is there any better or equal hope, in the world? In our present differences, is either party without faith of being in the right? If the Almighty Ruler of nations, with his eternal truth and justice, be on your side of the North, or on yours of the South, that truth, and that justice, will surely prevail, by the judgment of this great tribunal of the American people.

By the frame of the government under which we live, this same people have wisely given their public servants but little power for mischief; and have, with equal wisdom, provided for the return of that little to their own hands at very short intervals.

While the people retain their virtue and vigilance, no administration, by any extreme of wickedness or folly, can very seriously injure the government in the short space of four years.

My countrymen, one and all, think calmly and well, upon this whole subject. Nothing valuable can be lost by taking time. If there be an object to hurry any of you, in hot haste, to a step which you would never take deliberately, that object will be frustrated by taking time; but no good object can be frustrated by it. Such of you as are now dissatisfied still have the old Constitution unimpaired, and, on the sensitive point, the laws of your own framing under it; while the new administration will have no immediate power, if it would, to change either. If it were admitted that you who are dissatisfied, hold the right side in the dispute, there still is no single good reason for precipitate action. Intelligence, patriotism, Christianity, and a firm reliance on Him, who has never yet forsaken this favored land, are still competent to adjust, in the best way, all our present difficulty.

In your hands, my dissatisfied fellow countrymen, and not in mine, is the momentous issue of civil war. The government will not assail you. You can have no conflict without being yourselves the aggressors. You have no oath registered in Heaven to destroy the government, while I shall have the most solemn one to "preserve, protect, and defend it."

I am loath to close. We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained, it must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory, stretching from every battle-field, and patriot grave, to every living heart and hearth-stone, all over this broad land, will yet swell the chorus of the Union, when again touched, as surely they will be, by the better angels of our nature.

On any given day

WOW it looks like I had drawn some negative attention from some people with my repeated rantings about the Canadian visa bastards. Some say the blogs are now shifting towards the cussing end of spectrum and looking like Eminem lyrics (while the Real Slim Shady himself is getting more mainstream!). Well, that may be true. But please don't expect me to go out there to molly coddle those bigoted racist bastards at the other end of the table any time soon.

Now don't let it sound like a black & white thing. This being my profession, I do know what stress these guys are under. And I also understand the need for an effective immigration control in those countries concerned. Most of all, each day I face the moral dilemma between helping out someone whom I know would overstay his welcome whither he goeth, (and) making a living. The problem is not whether those bogus asylum seekers and overstaying fellows are morally repugnant or not, but whether the means we employ to weed them out is morally repugnant. If some people who legally gain entry into either UK or Canada then revert to their natural form, then we got a bug in our system. Acting like right bastards is certainly not a strategy advisable to a nation's representatives overseas. That would only push some characters to become more devious and would also set stage for development of an underground visa racket. During the past decade many foreign missions have had their visa officers ensnared by these operatives and some had even taken matters into their own hands, Visa for Sex scandal in US embassy being a good example.

Think I am exaggerating? I kid you not fellers, going price of Canada visa is US$10,000 around here, and that is the fee of the visa bastard – the Agent of course charges more (about 20K or more). For some reason, I have not come across a “bought” visa for UK recently, but its only a matter of time I guess. Like in every good detective story, the trail runs cold sometimes.... only till a w@nker at the HC wakes up from his you know what induced myopia and develop hots for some real stuff... Things you could ill afford with salary but petty cash with what you get from selling one or a few of them stickers..

I do not pretend to have a solution here, but I suppose their own countries' legal systems ought to have adequate laws to deal with illegal immigration. If those laws you prefer to introduce to curb illegal immigration draw flack from your own population (as is the case in UK – or better still as in the case of defeat of that Carla Bruni hand job in France less than a week ago), then you got a major bug in your system. Now I don’t want to sound like a BNF sympathiser here, but I too believe those boys have a point there. It's no good when people in a certain country feel unsafe of their own culture and future well-being due to immigration. So I suggest that we allow those people who are genuine enough to come and visit (and then return back!), and even let those who make a genuine effort to integrate to stay. That’s just fine. If you honestly try to weed out those who try to exploit the system, then that too is fine with me. But this sledgehammer policy of murdering every applicant is incomprehensible to me and it's tainted with racism and prejudice. Would you like to be associated with such a clan?

Well, why don't you take just one look at the two HCs in question, there is no need to go in, a mere glance will suffice. Looking like unwelcoming fortresses, with those toss pots holed up in there behind bullet proof glass partitions, irreverent telephone skills coupled with zero public relations, they simply don't convey a positive message to anyone. No they don't cut a good image – with anyone. I once took a UK national to his own mission and just one look at the edifice did him in. He later told me he thought he was being taken to a Abu Ghraib style military establishment for questioning! Mind you, they'd been very polite once the fellow got inside, its just that edifice scares the shite out of any normal human being. So much for the image conveyed by representatives of friendly nations. Now don't tell me its security concerns coz whore houses and casinos here don't have fortress walls or toughened glass two way mirrors. Period.

Canadian Imports

Jeeves, am I not glad to see you. We have not been here for a while, have we? Actually many things did happen during the hiatus, like the Sinhala new year, the May Day, and even Vesak festival. The latter was only a couple of days ago. Now all these things are important, and in here Sinhala new year and Vesak are the biggest events since days immemorial. Actually I wanted to write about them, but the Canadian officer bastards got in the way. Is that news?

Are these critters more important to me than national events in my native land? Well, the obvious answer is a big no no. Alas, the New Year was ruined by the major a-holes who were in charge of coming up with the traditionally observed auspicious time. Accordingly to their charts it fell in some ungodly hour somewhere in the deep end of the night and I for one did not observe it nor did anyone else whom I knew. I don’t know these toss pots take themselves how seriously. Someone told me they came up with this time to satisfy the self styled king. Well I don’t know about that, but I have a low opinion of them (and besides, the king feller gets the blame for everything here these days).

Anyways this thing threw cold water on the whole set up and it was a half-hearted celebration and no one in his right mind wanted to write about it. I am not sure if I am in full control of my faculties though - for I have just written a whole para on that shebang. I ought to have my head examined, maybe.

Anyway let us now pay a courtesy call to our nice friends at the Canadian outfit in Colombo. It's always comforting to be in the company of friends, as the saying goes. Here is what our friends have to say. Relax kids, its written so they just can’t turn around and say no we did not say anything of that nature. No wonder they have confined themselves in a fortified castle here...

This is what they have to say to a work permit applicant: You do not have enough ties to your home country (Sri Lanka).

And this man is legally married with a wife, has got legit kids, got commitments like providing refuge to aged parents, has a house of his own and bit of money in the bank! If these are not ties to one’s native land, then I just can’t work out what else they could be. Worst of all this guy’s kids are still schooling, it's not like as if he were a deadbeat with kids old enough to buy Paris Hilton video off the local store.

I just have one question, what are the courts in Canada take as established ties in any legal scenario? I am not going to take that much further here coz I am taking it to human rights grounds in both Canada and internationally. But being curious is no crime, so I am just telling you to help me out a bit here. Just give me an inkling to what these visa bastards would accept as ties. Because, despite of the friendly & generous nature of their compatriots, people appointed to represent them here are nowhere near an average Canadian either morally or intellectually.

All in all, I feel self pity. You know, even Canadians could not afford to send out one decent soul down to this piss pot to represent their fine nation. Talk about the street creds of Sri Lanka in international arena.... And here I am, fated to share this plot of land in middle of Indian ocean with both local and imported w@nkers alike......

National Day Comments

There had been a fire in Babylon which consumed it, well, as far as some bible nuts want to believe, that was the case. But we are not here to discuss that Babylon. We are here to discuss about coming of age of West Indies cricket. Why on earth are we on about that one on a visa blog? It's because its the April 1^st – The National Day here. On this holiest of holy days, we need to be light hearted (half hearted?) and have some fun. What do you fellers think, I mean after all where else do you find people who repeatedly claim to be happy while their cities are consumed with fires of corruption and vanity? It strikes me quite odd that these people here, robbed of their basic humanity and dignity on daily basis, still claim to be happy when world Happiness Indexes are surveyed.

Accordingly to some recent studies, the number of the beast 666, stands for Nero, who was indeed a beast when you consider some of his many atrocities. Things like burning Christians as torches to light up his gardens at nights.. Mind you, he was no sweetheart of the other Romans either. Nero fiddled while Rome burned might not be a true story, yet it sums up the good emperor quite accurately. Poor Nero needs not be worried, for now here on earth there is a whole nation composed almost exclusively of his direct descendants. A whole nation of Nero descendants, setting fire to everything in sight, be it their values, culture, justice, or their own humanity. Just like the Christians repeated Nero by torching people whom they considered as witches or heretics (after calling Nero the “Beast”) or peeled off flesh from living people (read something about Library of Alexandria), the modern Nero bunch here is busy setting fire to themselves and whatever they can lay their hands on. Quite an achievement for a nation who could not even cast a bicycle ball, yet think so proud of themselves and go on crowing about the feats of their poor ancestors..

Now lets look at the Windies. Despite of being able to upset the whole apple cart in 1950 in England by a series win with the help of Spin Twins (Alf Valentine and Sonny Ramadhin), their cricket went downhill and by 70's they were called “Calypso Cricketers” - out there to entertain the crowds while being the butt of humiliation. By this time the 3W's were all gone and the English had long ago found the answer to spinners (Colin Cowdrey 154, Peter May 285 unbeaten – setting a record 411 partnership for 4^th wicket). Yet that match in 1950 had changed cricket forever. It was no longer the White Man's game, we are not here to entertain you by losing to you, and the Windies made it clear to all. English reserve and stiff upper lip was loosened by the Caribbean fans wreaking havoc among the old boys, in no lesser place than at Lord's. Cricket had never been the same since, and it never will be, ever again.

Fast forward to 1975, Windies were having a bad patch of time. 1975 tour in Australia had been a disaster, with Jeff Thompson and Dennis Lillee (NOT Lillie, that was a different cricketer) tearing up the ranks in to pieces while biased umpiring and hostile local fans make you wonder if you have fallen in to purgatory through a hole in the pitch like Alice fell in Alice in Wherever, and having to battle all those bouncers which were surely bodyline, one can quite appreciate that people were losing the grip of the game. For the record, it took another island captain and a quarter of a century to bring around the gentlemen in Australians to the Gentlemen's game. Just for the record.

Clive Lloyd saw what happened and thought to himself “if they could do that with those two puny guys, I could do better” and returned to Australia with England as a first stop in 1976. Except this time he carried with him Holding, Roberts, Holder and Daniel – four lethal fast bowlers in one team. Poor English had no answer, and Tony Greig (who is surely a nice feller, except for this little mistake perhaps) put his foot in by commenting that he would make the Windiest grovel.

Just as planned, Clive Lloyd unleashed his fast bowlers on the hapless English and when it was all over – or rather when it was half over, the reigning comment amongst the fans was “who's groveling now?”. A series victory (and a humiliation for the English) with a new pace on the pitch by the new kids on the block had turned cricket upside down again.

I could go on to comment deeper on the Australian experience, but suffice it to say that they were hoisted with their own petard. The press was all screaming how “ungentlemanly” the Windies were and the Aussies were bitter losers, as usual. A more civilized nation would have asked themselves the question “is this not what we did to others?” but then again you couldn’t expect much from you know what, surely that would be asking too much from a nation of … now what was that word?

West Indies supremacy of the game was assured till 1995, where they had not lost a series from that day onwards, even against the odds of touring in Australia. Cricket had not seen anything like that before and it is unlikely to be seen again in a single lifetime, though a real cricket fan might insanely hope to witness it. A BBC programme titled Fire in Babylon describes the whole story from the Windies point of view, and it was pretty well done.

The moral of the story is simple. Idiocy may be acquired, but imbecility is surely hereditary. Only treatment is to save oneself from himself. Obama or any other boogeyman is not out to get you. If you did not play with a straight bat and was effed up in Geneva, then come again and play a proper game. Name calling and burning effigies is not going to win cricket matches. It’s that simple.

Procrastinate

Hi kidz, lets wrap up the late long February with some belated ranting on the blog of insomnia. Hey hey, where do we look now? The seemingly corrupted Canadian visa officer bastards here or good Mr Rush Limbaugh? Lets pick the latter, for that one is more interesting and had the balls to come forth and answer. Now the issue is all about abortion, I mean aborting the foetuses. Now this feller is all against it by the looks of it. I too used to be a “pro life” guy, but why the community ought to be given the option of aborting struck me like a lightning on a sunny day when I came across Mr Tony Blair.... Just think about it kids, if we were able to legally abort unwanted perils in 1953, what do you think today’s Britain would be like. Some things just should not be allowed to see the light of day. Considering the cost, even inhuman acts like aborting a foetus could have some good uses.

So anyways, this Limbaugh guy did a U-turn and now rants “I descended to.... level when I used those two words to describe Sandra Fluke...., I've always tried to maintain a very high degree of integrity and independence on this program. Nevertheless, those two words were inappropriate. They were uncalled for....” Oh yeah, sure babe. Calling someone a slut and prostitute because they are misaligned with you on an issue is surely a bad idea. By the way Mr Limbaugh, do you think this Sandra hottie had met Anthony too? Just wondering. After all she is a law student, I mean there is an increased chance she'd come across Anthony some way...

Then again, what's the big deal? Here in the cultural void called Sri Lanka, you just don't have to do much to be called a whore, the Golliwogs out here do it quite often to align themselves with their Western ideals! Being a woman is just about adequate to be called a whore by some Gollies here. Anyway Mr Limbaugh, the point is, did you or did you not use those words intentionally? It's OK if you meant it as far as I go, because (in your order) it's still quite better than committing murder of the unborn. But I am angry with you because I met Anthony, and if anyone out there has too strong opinions on moral & ethical footings of abortion, go meet Anthony, and on your way drop in at a chippy and ponder what the world would have been had they had the good sense to sort this issue rightly in 50's.

I can understand that writings above put some people at unease. I may or may not support abortion, and Anthony may or may not be such and such a person. But what I yearn to say is if we stifle the cries of the dissenters, they will opt themselves out of the debate. Just look at Rodney King incident in US, when the police beat up a black motorist for no reason. What happened was we did our best to sweep things under the carpet leading to a even more violent reaction. Now I myself do not condone songs like F*** the Police or Straight Outta Compton (both by NWA) or support their stance on the issue. But when you listen to the lyrics, the validity of their message hits you like a brick. These young men were simply seeking justice and equality, and nothing more. When the good, honest path to justice is obstructed, its only human to seek other means. We would not convince how dreadful abortion is by calling people sluts or prostitutes, not anymore than we would convince someone not to vote for a child murderer by calling he should have been (aborted) fixed before birth. It will only polarise the issue further by scaring off the moderates.

Now let us see what happens when polarisation doesn't happen and when the moderates are allowed in. The pigs coming out of the courthouse were greeted with a continuous booing – not by the gangsta rappers but by WHITE moderates! The image of a young white girl coming squarely in front of the escort to give out the biggest boo is crystallised in my mind, telling us all that every decent human being finds those cops repugnant. Ice Cube, who was former member of NWA has this to say to his kids about words he uses in his songs: “....appropriate times to use any kind of language.... Adults should never hear you use these words...”, now is this the malicious gangster you had in mind when you listened to his songs? Despite of what the fundies are telling us, moderation is a basic human quality, only that we do not recognise it because we are too afraid to accept it in our hearts that dissenters can be as much human as we are. 

I may not like Rush Limbaugh much, nor may I condone the language he used on pro-abortionist law student, but hounding him to come forth and apologise when he spoke his mind out on public airways (against what he considers as murder) is perhaps going too far. Because by OVERDOING that we are teetering on the edge of the very abyss Mr Limbaugh has fallen into. While every civilised society requires checks and balances like the debate now raging over Rush Limbaugh Show, by going too far with it will polarise our views and distract us from the real issue in hand, abortion.

Gentlemen, I now close my case (proposing that even Anthony deserves a chance to see the light of day). Any ideas?

The Masochists

Currently there is a huge uproar here about something the Yanks are going to bring up at the upcoming UN Human Rights convention at Geneva. The whole telly was taken over by saffron clad monks telling us of how unfair the West is and all. 

Although I can quite understand why there is cause for concern here, I just can't get a grip of what all the hysteria is about. I mean we got nothing in the variety of nuclear weapons or anything similar, that would push Yanks to bomb us or something like that.... Or am I missing something here? A few days ago, the whole army was put on red-alert, and only thing that happened was you woke up to find that fuel prices have matched those in UK! Not quite the threat to national security someone would be thinking..... A ha, I can now see the danger we are in as a nation, the Yanks and the West are after our oil reserves. But I am feeling more confident now as the monks had assured us on telly that they would not let those Western forces opposing us to exploit us. I am much thankful to them for their assurance so we have little reason to panic over here as the guardians are right at our doorstep. Now how many of you could have said that! Just look at the Iranians. With their oil and all, the mullah clan there had been soooo not forthcoming, but here it's a different story.

Coming to think of it, siding with those elements who actually kill them or deny themselves humanity is an ingrained trait among Sri Lankans (I am on about the NGO urged elements at NW areas here, OK). Long time before I had different views, but one particular incident had permanently altered my take on the issue.

There is a girl's school here called Musaeus College, which is run by a trust and is also partly governmental. Its named after a certain Mary Musaeus Higgins, who had initiated it for the sole purpose of uplifting the educational aspects of Sinhala Buddhist girls. Its situated on a small street called Rosmead Place in Colombo 7, which is the uber-posh postcode in Sri Lanka. So this Rosmead Pl. is named after some long forgotten British governor of colonial Ceylon (Hercules George Robert Robinson to be precise, Rosmead being his titular name, just like Prince of Wales), who accordingly to some, was a very cruel and ruthless man. Now, I have never had the (mis?)fortune of meeting the fellow in person, so I do not know if he were that bad or not, but that's beyond the point here.

Anyways, some people sometime ago wanted to remove this governor's name and rename the street as Musaeus Place, or Mary Musaeus Place. Now this is not uncommon as many streets are named after some famous landmarks there, Post Office St. , Harbour View Rd. , etc. being some obvious examples. The renaming movement had put forth many arguments for their case, including it being more relevant to present day, perceived antics of the late governor, there not being any street name to honour Mrs Higgins, and so forth. But the most forceful being that all the other fine street names which had ANY merit had already being replaced with those (names) of wonderful politicians of the present-day. No sane mind can counter THAT argument!

However, the renaming movement failed to gather sufficient momentum and had suffered a natural death. But the sad thing was that many people here had actively resisted naming the street after someone who had actually done something for them. Instead, they chose to keep the name of the person who tortured and killed their ancestors! Now just wait for second here. Imagine having a street called Adolf Hitler Avenue in Israel, or Osama bin Ladin Drive in NY city. Unthinkable? Well, we just did that!

A civilised nation is certainly unlikely to pick or keep a name of someone who ruthlessly hurt their ancestors as a street name, but here it is quite OK to do that. Just pause for a sec and give it some thought. As for the school itself, I propose to change its name too! Because Sinhala Buddhist anything is the last thing it has in its core values. An utterly Westernised institution turning out female Golly-Wogs, whatever that Mrs Higgins originally hoped for is long forgotten, and many affiliated personnels are reluctant to bring up the very purpose it was established. I mean, its just not posh enough for them to be grouped with so called Sinhala values and all.

Yes, we live in a place where we hero worship people who kill us. I do not know if governor Rosmead ever killed protesters with live ammunition or not, neither do I know if his cohorts habitually killed pedestrians with their fast moving escorts, nor do I know if he spent a lavish lifestyle at the expense of our forefathers, or if people were pushed off public roads to make way for him. No I seriously do not know if he ever did anything of the sort. Also I am yet to come across historical data of him pardoning a rapist, a murderer, a narcotics dealer, and an absconder of public funds. Most of all, as far as I know, he had not named a street or anything after himself while he was here. Rosmead Pl. was named AFTER he left here.

But I am told he was a ruthless and bad person and I believe it. I mean he was a Westerner, wasn't he, they are all bad and are out to get us. And I also support keeping his name on that street, because we hero worship our own nemesis like no other nation does. Oh there is one more thing, since we do not hold true to Mrs Musaeus's views, we ought to change the name of that school too, perhaps into that of someone who killed enough people during his term times. Any suggestions?

Taking everything into account, I have formed myself a serious philosophical question: If there is a karmic law out there that dictates you get what you deserve, can one verify that law through a cursory look into psyche of the people here?

Now, if anyone who reads this can resolve that theorem, he gets a price of LKR1,000 from me.

The Independence Day

It's the independence day here. Its been a long time and I was wondering “independence from what?”, when basic human dignity is taken away, when you are robbed of your wealth in broad daylight, WTF is the independence you are celebrating?

If any Sri Lankan is reading this, I have one thing to tell you: YOU have brought this upon yourself.

I can go on to blame the ignorant, corrupt, thuggish, politicians here for everything, but the sad truth is these people will never vote for you if you even had a modicum of good qualities. The idiot British are to be blamed for this mess really. They had cast this curse of universal franchise, upon a bunch of people who were not ready for it. Societies progress slowly (just read how it was when HRH Queen Elizabeth I was ruling England!), and when you push things on them prematurely, they tend to wither away. This also considering that unlike India, Sri Lanka had no solid cultural backbone when the British rule took over. So people simply did not have a compass of moral guidance to tell them where to go from there.

Now pundits of the “Purity of Sinhala-Buddhist Nation” clan will call out for my blood for writing this. “What about 2500 years of history?”, “What about these great artefacts of our ancestors here?”, they will crow on. I have one question for the: Show me one single custom, menu, dress, furniture, anything, that is uniquely ours.

The truth is our culture fell centuries ago. Like all the other cultures, like Buddha himself preached, impermanence had dealt us a severe blow. We fell. What we call culture today is a very recent invention, and it has absolutely nothing to do with Sinhala-Buddhism that we so proudly crow about.

Don't need to go into deep scientific arguments, just look at how and who you vote for! Do you suppose anyone with an iota of a deep culture and a set of values will do anything remotely resembling that? A cultured society has one single factor that sets us apart. They got their priorities right. Its not silly dances and customs that make you a cultured populace, it's getting your religion and priorities right.

Long time ago, someone asked me to go on (political) canvassing with him. So I went. As a matter of protocol, we asked (rather I) what members of the electorate wanted from our candidate whence he came into power. Their answers sickened me to the pit of my stomach and I wowed never to have anything to do with these people or their politics. There is simply no way an honest man can go into politics here and if one did, the system (read as electorate) will make sure he is corrupted beyond recognition. So I never blame the politicians for this mess. After all they are only human, aren’t they? I could never understand what is it these people wanted. When the recent war was won, the current president (or one of his henchmen) put out a sign in front of a government office. It read, “I did as I promised. Now its your turn”, implying that the officials do their level best just as the president had done with his duty. The result? The bunch of idiots in that office were worse off than ever! Performing any form of duty was the very last thing on their agenda, and this is with euphoria of victory coupled with an appeal from a president who was riding very high on popularity to the level of being worshipped by the masses. If this is the reaction the president himself is getting from them for a polite request, what the hell is the chance of you and I getting anything from them?

I have to be careful here, because sometime ago a humanities professor had done some work on this issue and published an article on it. Now the details of this are quite sketchy in my mind, partly because it was intended for light reading, and mostly because I did not pay great attention. He had shown that the Sinhala race originates from a part of Rajasthan in India. He points out that the populace of this are to be composed of very lose alliances of different tribes/clans. Not having a common goal is the trademark of that society, and uniting them in any list of common priorities set had so far failed. But when the real need and right leadership comes, they all unite as one, he points out. Further he goes onto say that once the task is accomplished the people will again go their separate ways as if nothing happened! According to him, it's not that we do not have a strong cultural root, but its the strength of this cultural root that keeps us apart! He further clarifies that no one, he means no one, will ever unite this nation as one with a single long term goal. It will always remain disunited as we see now, garnished with utter selfishness and contempt towards others of our own. But when the time comes, they will stand alone as one, only to disunite later on.

Looking at my life experience, and reading from our history, I can see that this man had a point. Maybe its the erratic point of view I (and some others) hold towards this whole affair that is at fault. So pundit type exclamations about virtues and priorities have little meaning. Unbeknownst to us, the masses have got it all in right order! So it is not a ship of fools as some of us think, but the outcome of a very ancient set of values that are ingrained into the very psyche of people here.

I very much hope that this professor guy is right......

Now go out and get some fun. Its your birthday today.

Inglorious (Canadian) bastards

Hell I have not been here for almost a month. Worry not kiddies, Captain Zap will fix that issue in pronto. Not many things happened in the past month except for another little visa scam from our good friends at the Canada HC, Colombo, and having being fated to constantly eat raw fish in the guise of holy Japanese food.

This visa matter at Canada HC is not getting improved and I am at a loss how to handle it. Now I understand that guys there are under some stress. But let me ask you. Now there had been 3 applications for work permit by one guy. In the first (not through us) it was flatly refused with dirty ticks all over (pointing out aspects where they deem he did not qualify for a visa). Fine. Guy comes here. Round 2. Refused on the grounds of not having a decent command of the lingo of English. Feller is not going to go there as an effing rocket scientist or anything, just a mere child minder whose sole duty is to teach host family's kids Sinhalese. OK conceded. Round 3. This time with an English certificate – about 8 months after the very first application. Do you know what they said? English (again) and had those lovely crosses everywhere.

So what's the big deal?

Here it is. If you think his lingo is still at fault, they way to verify it must have been to re-interview him. WTF is the logic in saying “Your English was poor eight months ago, so I assume its poor now”. WTF do we pay visa processing fees for? Secondly, a call came from a go-between at the HC. This contact explicitly mentioned “Your application is refused, I could arrange the visa for LKR 500,000”. On further investigation it turned out the go-between was saying absolute truth. It was refused on every conceivable count. Funnily, the arseholes at Canada HC had the nerve to hail up and ask for a new copy of the labour contract. Mind you, this was while they have already refused this guy's visa, and while it was waiting on the desk – to be added a fake date or some shite like that. Anyway the applicant could not afford the fee requested by the go-between. And things fell apart.

Nevermind these things, just try this question. How was it possible that the same applicant had been awarded all points in one instance (bar the English matter) and then being denied any in the subsequent application? How and what made his employment, training, professional, certificates valid in one instance & invalid in the other?

The truth is bare and its here for all to see. The whole setting is a den of thieves, and applying for a visa with them is nothing more than playing the fucking national lottery. Whether you get it or not is determined by your star, not your documents. If the star does not help, you could always bribe them. Illegal migration agents here do not promise you a visa for no nothing, they know that with the right contacts, you CAN get the visa.

Once before also I had good evidence on this and I promptly alerted the authorities in Canada. Do you know what happened? Nothing! So much for the efforts to stop illegal immigration. Self-righteousness can take them only one place. Nowhere.

If anyone reading this is interested in applying for a Canada visa from Colombo, you better heed my advice. Its a scam.