Home & Away - Canadian style

Exactly what constitute “ties to one’s country of residence”, considering the person under the microscope is a mere 21 year old? Well, let us make things clear here. Assume this 21 year old is seeking employment in, er.. Canada.

If he had a house, a car, some bank savings worth about 2% of Microsoft Corporation, and half a dozen wives & 21 kids around, I bloody well don’t think he’d go to Canada to wash plates out there in the first place.

Second option is he has an extensive family – yet biology intervenes and one can have only one mother and one father. Two mothers + one cute dada IS possible if one momma opted to be on the wrong end of the turkey baster. Yet this option is not yet widely available in Canada itself, let alone in Sri Lanka. And the possibility of having dozen brothers and sisters is not much of a go either as both biology & the FPA gets in the way.

I was looking for an answer to this question for awhile now, as I just can’t work out what a 21year old kid could have as ties to ones country except having a normal set of parents (02) a few siblings (say 03), friends and relatives, and a prospective claim to parental property.

Good visa officer says “you have not demonstrated sufficient ties to your home country”….. Like what? Do you expect him to have two marriages behind him? Lets look at some numbers here shall we?

In Canada, Average age at first marriage 30.6 years…. Average number of children per family 1.1, Average number of persons in a household 2.5…. And you want to see ties? As far as claims to property & family ties are concerned Sri Lanka is way way ahead in the game.

I can go on, but when you see the big picture, there is little difference between possession/finance fronts either, between an average Canadian youth and a Sri Lankan of same age and social class (when you adjust as dictated by economists) – specially between this guy and an average McDonalds crew slave in Canada. If he had any bit more, then he ain’t be going in there in the first place.    

The truth is they are worried this guy will seek citizenship in Canada in a latter date. But you are under no obligation to approve that application whence it cometh. And surely it is not illegal. If this is such a big concern, scrap the bloody programme in pronto! Sorted.

Preventing people with genuine LMO, Job Offer, Desire to make a buck or two, Have Qualifications, Have a life to fall back in here, etc., from going into Canada in fear they might seek citizenship in this manner is IMHO, racist, bigotry, and dumb.

You might as well kill kids, lest they turn into serial rapists or mass murderers in some future date. That too can be written off under pre-elimination of a calculated risk.

Over to you, Mr Visa Officer

Osama, Spitz, and the God scientist

I haven’t been here for a while, almost two months. Now that is some time, considering we are now at a world without Mr Osama bin Laden (wanted to write but India Today had done an excellent cover - damn), no more Prno-Scan in America (damn again - it was too late when I found out), Dr. Spitz gave his lengthy testimony at the recent trial (no I ain’t talking about it here - too morose), and that Channel 4 had repeated the video clips. With some new materials as a bonus extra!

Where does an average visa consultant sit in this disorderly world? Perhaps it is a matter I should give more thought to. D.. again, Greta Garbo (or was it Jean Harlow) had given the answer before I was born: You always knew where you are when you talk to Sam Goldwin - NOWHERE... I mean could she not have held it a bit longer till I invented it? Incontinence is not confined to that watery stuff alone it seems.. Well they say words flow, like.. like ... well like that stuff, specially when you second guess or jump others.

Actually none of these things above took my attention as much as the Arsenic poisoning hysteria currently in Sri Lanka. Sure I have had a right go at the so called scientists who are attached to local universities. But they were all argumentative, I mean its just sort of my opinion based on available information on their relative stupidities. Yet this one, this one case leaves nothing to imagination: We employed divine intervention in detecting arsenic in water in North Central Province. Period.

WTF?
You used what? What was the protocol for extracting (if that be the word) divine intervention in detection of arsenic in a sample of water? Cane we repeat it? What were the materials and methods? How often did the gods chip in? Is there any statistical significance in this particular reagent (god-s) has improved detection frequency or accuracy of test results? What was the number of false positives & negatives involved?

Haldane once quipped that “Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the first”. He’d bloody well haven’t had any idea of the universities in Sri Lanka, or he would have re worded the sentence. Or maybe not, since universe is all inclusive, including the univers(ities) in Sri Lanka and the idiot swarm in there.
Amen