Diversity Visa program (DV-2017) / US Green Card is now open

Hello everyone. Sorry we haven’t been here for a while. I was involved in an international research, like one of those researches carried out by the Girl's High School in Kelaniya on CKD (Chronic Kidney Disease) in Sri Lanka. We all know what they found. Jackshit. Oh, here I am back again.

Now to the important topic, it's the US diversity visa time. In other words, American Green Card season, which I call the silly season. For those who are interested, please visit the OFFICIAL SITE at www.dvlottery.state.gov. As again, please don't go to anywhere else – because the real McCoy is here, not somewhere else. 

This perennial hassle of having to help DV Lottery entrants has taken its toll on me. So, as in previous years, I am trying to add my two cents worth - so you won't come here to waste my time and your money! Your money most certainly because you will be taxed heavily if you came here.

Remember that Green Card – or the DV Lottery, is absolutely FREE. That means don't pay anyone. Simple. Secondly, please please only apply through the official portal (www.dvlottery.state.gov ). There are fake sites with similar spellings – so be ware. A good rule of thumb is to see if you can see .gov at the end of the web address... Third, all you need is your own details and a photograph. Nothing more. If anyone asked for your credit card details, or phoned you about DV Lottery, then just run a mile from them.

Oh, and on the bright side, you don't need a university degree to qualify, and those occupational lists are for people who don't have minimum educational qualification – so don't panic after paying a visit to the qualifying occupations list! Is that clear? If you are a person living in Sri Lanka but born in Bangladesh, India, or Pakistan, then, you are out of luck. You could put yourself in an application if your spouse is born in Sri Lanka. Otherwise, sorry. I write this because there is a substantial number of people living here from those countries – and asking us about DV programme. Sorry kids.

If you qualify for entry, here is what you do.

1. You must have an email address to complete the form. If you don't have one, get a free email from Yahoo or Google (or somewhere else you fancy).
2. Gather your personal details – this means your address, date of birth, photograph, etc.
3. If you are married, then get your wife's/husband's & children's details too. Including clear photographs.
4. Visit the official site (given above), read the instructions, and click begin entry.
5. Follow the instructions given on the site – it is simple, true, and you just can't go wrong.
6. Please do not duplicate applications – meaning only apply once. Once you get the Submission Received / Confirmation – stop!!! Print the page for reference and keep it safe.
7. Your spouse (wife or husband) can make their own application, with you included in it. This means if you are in a relationship, you get two chances. Don't confuse this. Your partner's application is a separate one – where they are the APPLICANT, you are just mentioned in passing.... So don't fill two applications yourself!!!

After you apply, it is a waiting game, meaning you have to wait a long time for the results. Once the results dates are officially announced, you can log into the same site and click the link to see if you have won. This will need the reference number on that confirmation page you printed - so please keep that printout in a safe place.

Oh, and good luck to all of you.

Sri Lanka Presidential Polls

Hello kidz, here we are at the end of yet another Sri Lanka election. If there is anything in this country, it's elections – this being the third within the span of one Earth year. Don't you kidz worry, people here simply love it – life here would be unbearable without elections.
To sum it up for those of you who have missed news: One Autocratic Dictator has been deposed. Like to know what predictions were? Best one I got was - never mind from who- gave figures of:
MR(Autocratic outgoing dictator) 52.03% to 49.12% (Median = 50.58%)
MS (Possible upcoming dictator) 47.43% to 56.51% (Median = 51.97%)
They actually scored 47.6% and 51.3% respectively. Kudos to whoever did the maths, because I have never come across such an accurate prediction even in a Western democracy, let alone in a place where election violence, rigging, & voter turnout are matters better left for inscrutable means of providence. Just which weird statistical tool is capable of taking vote rigging into account is something that evades me.

People about here believe strongly in karma. And karma it was, as the outgoing president had three more years left of his legitimate tenure – when bad karma forced him to listen to his astrologer and call on a snap election which he ultimately lost. Shit happens. His opponent had been one of his most trusted and loyal lieutenants. The man it is claimed, has foregone becoming Prime Minister of Sri Lanka in order to pave the way for ex-president to become PM (and then onto become autocratic dictator!). The two had a cordial dinner of pancakes (actually a type of unleavened bread called aappa) one night. Little did the poor ex-prez knew he was dining with the very man who would tomorrow afternoon launch an effective campaign to remove him. Karma is a biatch...

Karma seems to have played a major role in election result as well. Reliable sources indicate that vote rigging went pear shape when another trusted lieutenant defected - otherwise the slim margin he lost would surely be accounted ..... Together with rest of stalwarts who exhibited shifty loyalties, no last minute rescue attempt was on the cards. Dignified exit was the only valid move he was left with and needless to say that the fellow complied.

So what now? Looking at the international scenario, we need to know that both United States of America and United Kingdom have appointed new heads of diplomatic mission here - in a move completely unrelated to election or new regime.

As for United Kingdom, I don’t really see any need of fixing anything, neither is there any space left for change in either policies or practices. Well, anyone who knows anything about UK Home Office knows this as a given. I would not use the term Her Majesty’s - as I am under oath not to tarnish her name.... and then you called that shite hole HM Home Office.... All I say is that no constructive man has come to Colombo from London after the departure of David Gladstone, and he made the blunder of attempting to dine with savages in a formal dinner setting.

India and Uncle Sam must work together in building relations with the new regime. Especially without scaring off the Chinese. Geopolitical reality is not to compel China to take Maldivian option- which is more dangerous and has darker outcomes to all involved. US foreign policy should have done something long ago if they did not like a Chinese outpost in Colombo. Now its too late. Looking at economic and political stability, US can safely retain their current policy on these matters - which has been more or less encouraging US investments here. As for Indians, its better if they expand (does not mean dislodging Chinese) their business activities here, while relaxing policies curtailing free travel between the two countries. Trade deals must offer something in return to Sri Lanka - as current scenario is necessarily biased towards Indian advantage.

European Union does not cut out a pretty picture around here - something they need to fix. As we all know some pro-China systems here hasn’t helped either. In my opinion winning the hearts of masses is more necessary at this point than socioeconomic infrastructure mambo jumbo they are so fond of. Actually, the new regime is fundamentally more open towards larger word out there than the previous one. They might look pro-Western, but really they are more inclined towards Asian scene and are slightly unlikely to play into economic deals trap - either openly or cached.

Whats my opinion of all this going on? Well, when the first World President (Barak Obama) was elected, a newsprint invited people to express their wishes from his administration in less than 10 words. I was told that winning entry was : I hope he will let us down gently. In the melee of struggle for power and direction, I just hope the soup tastes OK.

A wonderful Christmas full of love, peace, and happiness

Having just passed midnight hour of Christmas eve, its officially Christmas here in Colombo. It has been raining constantly for the last seven days, like as if we are approaching another Noah's flood. Good one, many around here would say. Good one to wash away all the dirty politicians, they'd add. Yet, its the Season and I am in good spirits (or high on spirits – whichever I am not sure because those lovely spirits have clouded my judgement).

If we take the fortnight from here to 8th January, Sri Lanka will have a visit made by His Holiness, Pope Francis, and a presidential election. Quite a mouthful for a small island nation. And people are sick of politicians. Did I tell you that I am in good spirits because its the Season? Well, I don't hate anyone enough to hope they'd get washed off by this incessant rain into oblivion.

Lets take a biblical approach here. A president coerced by his international patrons to initiate what he owes them: The poor man is trapped between Scylla and Charybdis. Deliver the goods to his foreign Darth Vader masters – him & his whole family is unmasked and politically dead. Gaddafi style. Not deliver the goods to Darth Vader clan, they will freeze all his offshore accounts and fund a coup to oust him. His entire clan will die penniless AND Gaddafi style.  What you get now is a perfect recipe for an early election, way way before the current mandate ends. What would anyone (YOU) do in such a situation? Holding the election now and extending mandate for 8 years to come – and then deliver goods to Masters of Dark is the only viable course of action. Any other course is simply suicidal.

Considering his grave predicament, and the fact that anyone & everyone here is also either partners of crime or guilty of wretched complicity, “stone pillaring” one man as the scapegoat does not sound fair to me. Now this is where Seasonal goodwill comes in. Its simply called Forgiveness.

Can we, despite of whatever we purport ourselves to be, can we actually forgive others? Solemnly accepting one has erred and forgiving others for trespasses are the hardest things to come by – now this goes for all people, myself included. Preaching forgiveness and humility is one thing. Practising those are surely a different kettle of fish. Slippery matters they are, just like fish. Even a well known phrase like Forgiven, not forgotten (hi Chrissie) can be interpreted as I know wht ya done biatch bt won't do you in for it now.

Why is this stuff on my Christmas blog? Because as age matures me, I have come to consider that hatred and despise for others actually do more harm to ourselves and those around us. Self-righteousness and inability to forgive others just wells up anger and contempt within ourselves, burning up from inside the little humanity we could muster in modern days. Actually, speaking in modern corporate productivity terms, its the most counterproductive load of garbage you can carry around.

So in this Christmas, let us all resolve to throw away this heavy burden, this poison, we carry around with us. Otherwise it will grow to engulf us completely, then those around us, and then our whole nation. Living in an embittered nation full of vengefulness and misguided by self-righteousness is surely no fun at all. Carpe diem (seize the day – a Latin idiot, no I mean an idiom) and let us resolve this Christmas to be rid of this bundle.

I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins (Isaiah 43:25, KJV)

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU ALL – JUST DON'T FORGET TO HAVE FUN

www.theforgivenessproject.com
http://www.aish.com/tp/i/sacks/286491731.html

Latin lovers and the losers

Recently I had the (mis?)fortune of coming across an article on Aeon Magazine, which questions if the human progress has come to a halt. The writer laments that nothing ground-breaking has happened in technology for the past 40 odd years. Actually this in no way news to me. Long time ago in my student years I came across Kary Mullis (PCR man) ranting just that - “the so called war on cancer has been a damp squib''. Ah, true. And so are all the anti-psychotic drugs, and whatnot people are told to lo and behold. In those student days of mine, there was big talk on being forever young (New Scientist cover story), forages of artificial intelligence, elixir just around the corner of local fish & chips, ad infinitum. Put it this way, its all bunk. I could say that, because having attended a funeral AND a birthday in span of less than one Earth revolution one just gets around to reflect on life, universe, and everything. 42 of course is the answer – whereupon 44 is the approximate answer – like the kid who wrote 665.9 as the approximate number of the beast...

Then again, I am not at all surprised with where we have gotten to – considering the state of education among youth today. Maybe it's the way people see things whence they are over the hill – whole history is a series of complaints in a nut-shell. If you are interested, Plato lamented “Our youth now love luxury. They have bad manners, contempt for authority; they show disrespect for their elders and love chatter in place of exercise..........”; while Cicero also did the same – if my stupid teachers at school got around to teach me right. Well, it's nothing new is it? Coming around (getting around?) Simon Jenkins was on London Times justifying baby-Killer Blair's educational reforms. Exactly what are those reforms? They were taking away math and science from the kids, Blair & his crony David Blunkett. Silly man was not content with his own blindness but sought to blind the youth of his day as well. Mr Jenkins (sounds like a sheep sh......r to me) says he was compelled to study Trigonometry and Latin and whatnot at his public school – but none of those had ever been useful in his life – ever. True. Who the hell said it was all for use? For love of Jove, school education is not a corporate training programme intended to squeeze last bit of usefulness (productivity) out of kids. Idiot. 

As much as I myself lament HIS youth at an English public school without toilet doors, I can equally sympathise with current youth who are deprived of classical education. Maybe Plato foresaw this – whence he said “they no longer rise when elders enter the room; they contradict their parents, chatter before company; gobble up their food and tyrannize their teachers” - who wants to respect teachers who can't teach crap in the first place (and the parents who can't afford public schools!). Lets take a recent example here – just to give you all an idea of what youth today are like. I was asked to help out a friend's young daughter recently. She is such a vivacious lass with a name to match – charming name that is, alas, for all that potential, the kid could not comprehend a modicum of Latin – not a phrase, not a word, not a even an abbreviation. Never mind French or Sanskrit or any other civilised language. Nothing. I once came across in a book (The Dam Busters, I think) about a pilot in WWII whom the British air control was desperately trying to communicate with – but the writer says “He appeared to speak no known human language”. Thought that was an exaggeration – till I met this kid! 

Put it this way, this girl is surely a lucky one. Because if Plato, or for that matter anyone else from that side of history before the advent of holy computers, got around to meeting her they'd sure wring her lovely neck in desperation. You can leave Latin out of this - but Sanskrit? Surely they are exposed to that language around here, and it's not speaking dead languages I am on about in here. You don't have to be a cunning linguist (ha ha I got you) to see the point. 

If we go on like this, we will have no future left. Utile dulci will become our motto – because there is no tomorrow, Memento mori shall be our religion because there is no cure for diseases, and that verse on some books can be read as Domi Mina Nus Tia Illu Mia!!!

Now go decipher this – it is on Sir Christopher Wren's tomb: "Lector, si monumentum requiris, circumspice" 

PS You can Google for that, which is better than knowing Latin sometimes. 

U.S. Green Card visa interview

It's the Green Card interview time around here and I thought of giving some advice on facing the visa interview.

First thing to remember is that visa interview is many faceted - personal as well as unpredictable factors can decide if your visa application is a winner or gets rejected.

What consular officers would really like to see is that applicants are honest, do not overstay, and do not mess things up if the visa is granted. Their biggest concern over visit visa applicants really is possibility of staying illegally in the U.S. But Diversity Lottery being something else, please don't go there (interview) and play “I don't wanna stay in America” card, Pleeease.. Whole point of going for DV Lottery interview is staying in U.S.

In simpler terms, here is what you need to prepare for that US Green Card visa interview.

1. Be honest – DV lottery is a state department matter and the interview guy doesn't really care who you are – but things might not turn in your favour if he thinks you are a liar. So please be honest as much as humanely possible.

2. Have your documents ready – this includes those police certificates, educational qualifications, marriage and other certificates, and sponsor details. Don't go there and look lost in a cart load of documents. Have them neatly in a folder,  just take the ones that matter.

3. Dress nicely – Americans like to dress up and don't look like a jerk! Impressions matter! A tie and neatly ironed cloths are quite helpful and will consolidate your position.

4. Know what you are saying to the interviewer: Sometimes they might ask a random question or two on your occupation or motives. Have some idea what to say if asked on these matters.

5. A formal greeting before you sit down – Good morning – is such a neat icebreaker and puts both of you at ease. No need to bend over backwards or look servile, but everybody appreciates a pleasant person. Know that.

6. If you could, take some bank documents to prove your earning potential and ability to support yourself during the first few hard months in U.S. Although they are unlikely to discuss finance in depth, having these helps.

7. Be assertive but pleasant. Cut an image of being formal yet outgoing. Whatever you do, avoid expressing opinions on politics and religion – no matter which side of fence you fall in these matters.

8. If you are asked a tough question like “why are you leaving home to settle in U.S.”, don't panic. Tell him something neutral like “there is plenty opportunities to realise dreams in U.S.”, or how about “I want to build a better future for my children” - DON”T say something like “I am so fed up living in this rathole..” Because most Americans are good patriots and such comments don't cut a fine image of you in them.    

Finally, winning Green Card Lottery (as it's commonly called) does not guarantee you American visa. Consular officers aim to get desirable people into U.S., not those whom they deem are undesirable or unlikely to be successful in U.S. (and join the state charity burden). So try to make a good impression backed up by good paper evidence if needed. Word of caution here about new regulations: Some people get rejected over educational qualifications. You must have at least A/L (= U.S. High School Diploma), OR 2 or more years of recent work experience in one of the qualifying occupations. This means if you are a degree holder or have good A/L (passed!) - then don't mess it up by sticking in a work qualification!!!
here is the link if you need further information:
http://travel.state.gov/content/visas/english/immigrate/diversity-visa/if-you-are-selected/confirm-your-qualifications.html

Good luck

The Jews and Their Lies

What do you think of the Israel and Middle East situation? For some ungodly reason, this has recently become a question that I am asked quite a bit. Why, it evades me. For one, I have never set foot on Israel, and like hell I am not a practising Jew or anything. When asked about Israel, Daniel Barenboim (who is Jewish) said “This is where I want to call home, but I just can't (obviously referring to their relations with the Arab world)”. Think you could dig this up in BBC Reith Lectures when he was the speaker. No, Sue Lawley is NOT Jewish – she is very English, WASP. Lest you ask..

The pattern here is that some people want to blame the Jews for the actions of the ISIS or whatever those beheaders call themselves. I don't know if Israel (or Jews) has anything to do with these guys. Its the bloody yanks and the good Europeans who are responsible for the creation and sustenance of ISIS. These refined gentlemen saw them (at first) as a tool to topple unfavourable ME governments, till the day the monster got out of hand and started beheading their own citizens. Stupid.

Still don't get it? Here is a bit of Torah for you:

All Monsters turn on their Creators, sooner or later. Period. (I refer to Torah here in the sense they are teaching that has been accepted by a long-term consensus because it is based firmly on some precedent – not in as Five Books of Moses).

Here in Sri Lanka, a minuscule minority of the populace is busy blaming the Jews for everything that happens to them. They'd blame the Jews even if a mosquito bit them. Why, it could have been a Mossad agent disguised as a mosquito who came to bite them - in order to infect them with dengue fever. Do you think this is way off the scales? Actually these guys find conspiracies everywhere they go. So if you think this is an exaggeration, wait till you hear about their Islamophobia. 

Unlike Jewish haters who are fortunately not many, people who actually (literally) seek and fear Muslim bogeyman are a LARGE minority here. The Musalman bogeyman is accused of many things. Foremost being distribution of some confectionery variety that strilises Sri Lankan women, followed closely by the fear of organising a Jihad on Sri Lanka soil, besides the Islamic monster is more conniving and subtler than the Jew (as in Martin Luther's Jews and their lies). I am not making these up. Limitless rantings of the Islamophobic are everywhere. You could hardly walk to the shop without having to overhear some nutter complaining about some foul deed he suffered at the hands of Islamic monster. There is a quango here which I call Bodu Balu Sena – a bunch of misguided lunatics who worry every night about impending Muslim invasion of Buddhist Sri Lanka. If you want to lose sleep because you fear monsters are under your bed, fine. This is a problem of their own making. The problem is, just like Martin Luther, these people are spreading fear and hatred amongst their congregations, and a sizeable number of lunatics have come out of the woodwork.

The real problems in this country are not an Islamic invasion, but abject poverty, loss of hope, corruption of democracy, utter corruption of politicians, lawlessness, and deterioration of moral fibre. This self inflicted malady, this cancer, this insanity they all harbour - this is set to eradicate this hapless miserable race from the face of Earth much much long before any Islamic conspiracy succeeds in that.

The funny (depending on how you view that is) thing is Muslims are not alone in their conspiracy phobias. Just tune in the telly, and you'd hear their politicians blasting the West indicating that there is a Western conspiracy to topple the government. Gosh. Really! Actually here in Sri Lanka, ordinary populace is gripped by three varieties of paranoid hysteria.

1. There is a Western conspiracy to overturn the government (as Western powers have nothing better to do with their time other than toppling this cardboard state)
2. The Islamic invasion to destroy the Sinhalese civilisation is nigh (this one is rather fuelled by Muslims themselves by some of their hideous actions)
3. Israel / Jews are conspiring with Americans to destabilise the state (this is because Jews don't have enough problems already of their own making!)

While the whole Sinhalese populace is lost and wondering in the desert of conspiracy phobia, their real nemesis – that is gradual deterioration of moral fibre, sense of justice, and application of logic – is at their heels waiting for them to tire in the phobia desert – so it could devour this stupid race in one bite.

If one imagines this nemesis to be a type of living monster – then it must be one with an awful sense of taste. Because I simply can't fathom any creature, not even a monster, who'd find this miserable race palatable. Shit happens, even to monsters.....

The Wedding Observer

Many people have dreams of living in exotic places – mostly because travel industry, Hollywood, and people like those who are in charge of Lonely Planet promote it. But living in godforsaken places is not as much fun as it is being painted. A pest controller in UK once said on Times (of London) “People want to come to country to get close to nature, but when nature comes close to them, they want to kill it”. Fortunately for Messrs. Fox, Badger, & Squirrel, the guy routinely turned down silly requests to put Strychnine in their food.

Here is a trite description of daily affairs from one of those exotic places – Sri Lanka. One of the things that hit your head like a brick at a wedding here is that there are no historical wedding customs here. No wonder Sir Ivor Jennings said that Sri Lanka is a cultural desert. From matrimonial attires to best man & bride’s maid, and from there onwards to incantations of Jayamangala gaatha, and then to the point of culmination that is called Exchanging Rings, it’s all a Western affair. In between and shortly after the aforesaid, a hell of lot faux western events takes place, finally concluding with honeymoon and home-coming. Oh, and the rest of the stuff are either Indian imports or quite recently added events having absolutely no historical root.

As much as I love my friends, relations, & colleagues, I hate weddings. I just can’t stand the cultural melt pot. Here I am, dressed in my Sunday best, at another wedding. Not knowing anyone else in there except for the bride (who, I must add, is a fine young lady of good upbringing) and her parents, I sat at a corner table away from the public eye. Fortunately for me some nice family with a charming young daughter came along seeking seating arrangements and as luck would have it, sat at my table. Considering that I despise vehemently the ranting of Ashtakha Man, I was desperately seeking for some diversion. Till they came it had been my phone. And once they came, no ice-breaker came and I delved back into my phone. Ashtakha Man was ranting on some king Okkaka, I could never work out how this guy is related to people in Sri Lanka, but his name crops up at EVERY wedding, and that at some length. The mere mention of the name is Strychnine to me, which is incidentally derived from nux vomica plants. The connection being that Okkaka rhymes with Okkara (meaning nauseas in Sinhalese) and I say unto ye, these Ashtakha Men bring up that name to the point of , of, ad nauseam.

Again, luck was on my side. The young lady’s dad was of conversational type and he broke the ice, and I found myself in good company. Praise be to G-d, I could take my mind off the faux-western procession going on, which now it seemed a million miles away. Interestingly, the guy turns out to be an ex-government officer on the same wavelength. This is a rare find indeed. During the rest of the wedding, besides chatting up the young lady, I was busy trying to persuade him to write up his memoirs on his days at the government department. But the thing didn’t take wings as he was rather concerned with offending some people (by writing it up).

So what about the wedding? Well, I have known the bride & her family for over a quintillion years and I have nothing but good to say about them. She followed her heart’s desire and married someone she fell in love with at 15. The groom turned out to be an affable young man himself, with a good secured position in IT industry, and his family seemed to be OK type too. What else could a young girl desire in life. Crowd was in a jovial mood and there was merriment everywhere, which is indeed a good omen. The venue was nice too, being a hotel at the sea front with some grand architecture, although I couldn’t agree with the service that much. With such a fine young couple in our presence with all their hopes & dreams poised to become reality, who cares about service!

Here is wishing them a blessed married life with bliss all throughout their lives and those of their posterity. Shalom.